Sa Pasilyo


Sa tuwing nakikita kita, kahit dalawampung metro pa ang layo, laging may dagundong na bumabalot sa aking dibdib. Sintigang naman ng disyerto itong lalamunan ko.

Sana’y maaari tayong makapag-usap. Sapat na marahil ang kalahating oras para matanong ka tungkol sa iyong personal na buhay, maikuwento sa iyo ang personal kong buhay, at higit sa lahat ng ninanais ko – maipaliwanag sa iyo itong kung anong pagkabagabag na lagi kong nasasalubong sa tuwing nagtatagpo ang ating daraanan.

Samantala, umikli na sa sampung metro ang ating pagitan. Paano kaya kita kakausapin? Ano kaya ang dapat kong sabihin?

“Magandang hapon. Maaari bang humingi sa iyo ng pabor? Puwede ba tayong mag-usap? Kahit kalahating oras lang.”

Nakakahiya. Baka mapagkamalan mo pa akong salesman na nangungulit sa isang kliyente. Baka tawanan mo lang ako.

“Patawad, pero, alam mo ba kung saan ang faculty room ni Bb. Rosales, ‘yong titser sa Ingles?”

Nakakatawa. Hindi ako dapat magsalita ng ganito. Baka hindi mo ako sagutin. Sino ba namang estudyante rito ang hindi nakaaalam sa nag-iisang silid ng mga guro? Baka isnabin mo lang ako.

Siguro, nararapat lamang na sabihin ko ang totoo.

“Magandang hapon. Alam mo bang lagi kong inaabangan ang pagdaan mo rito sa pasilyo? Sa ikatlong palapag ka, tama ba? Dito naman ako...Hindi siguro tama’ng aminin ko sa iyong minamahal kita dahil hindi mo naman ako paniniwalaan. Hindi iyon uubra. Pero kung sakali mang dumating ang panahong nanaisin mo nang marinig ang mga salitang iyon, lagi lang akong nag-aabang dito.”

Hindi. Hindi mo naman paniniwalaan ang pinagsasabi ko. O kung sakali man, baka hindi ka na dumaan pa rito. “Sori,” baka sabihin mo, “ako nga ang mahal mo pero hindi ikaw ang para sa akin talaga.” Baka ikatigil pa ng pagtibok nitong puso ko anuman ang sagot na ibigay mo. Baka nga hindi ako makarekober sa ganitong problema. Ni kailanman.

Malapit na ngang magkurus ang daraanan natin pababa sa hagdanang saksi sa sapot nitong aking mga damdamin. Tatlong metro, dalawang metro, isang metro: bum! Parang may ugat na napatid sa gitna ng puso kong nag-aalab. Naglakad ako pabalik, tumakbo at naghanap sa iyo muli sa dagsang pulutong ng mga estudyanteng nagmamadaling makalabas na tila mga langgam ngunit para kang bulang kaybilis mawala.

Lagi iyong nangyayari. Hinding-hindi ko madala ang aking sarili na makipag-usap sa’yo.

Isang magandang umaga, nasulyapan kitang muli sa paborito kong pasilyo. Nakaramdam ulit ako ng dagundong sa aking dibdib. Isang malungkot na senaryo ang agad tumambad sa aking isipan – na walang sali-salita’y bigla kang naglaho sa pulutong nang magtagpo tayo sa pasilyo. Kailanman.

Bigla akong kinilabutan nang makita kong papalapit ka na. Ayaw kong bigla kang mawala. Tatakbo ako – papalayo sa’yo. Ayaw kitang maglalaho. Tatakbo ako.

Ilang saglit pa lamang, napalingon ako. Hinding-hindi ko maipagkakamali ang boses na narinig ko.

“Sobrang lungkot ng istorya sa pader, hindi ba? Alam mo, saksi rin ang pasilyo sa mga nararamdaman ko.”

Oo, iyan nga. Iyan rin sana ang balak kong sabihin sa iyo.

What makes public school kids excel in school
By Queena N. Lee-Chua

(Note: This first of the two-part Special Report appeared on the front page of the Philippine Daily Inquirer on Feb. 2 and 3, 2007.)


(First of two parts)
Last year, the most outstanding student in my college algebra class at the Ateneo de Manila University did not come from an exclusive private school or a Chinese-Filipino institution.

Von Karlo Sinence, a scholar, graduated from Parang High School, a public school in Marikina City.

Two years ago, in my introductory psychology class, Francis Alcausin was one of a handful of students who received an A on his term paper.

Francis, also a scholar, graduated from Marikina Science High School, again a public school.

True, Von and Francis had teachers who motivated them. Von in particular says that he owes a debt of gratitude to his freshman teacher, Alden Madrigalejo, for training him in math. But many of their classmates did not perform as well as they did.

What is the secret of their success? The answer is family.

Education, it is said, begins at home. Many Filipino families view education as the key to a brighter future. Students in the private schools, with adequate resources and well-trained teachers, may be said to have an academic edge.

However, in the past few years, I have happily observed that several children from low-income families manage not only to stay in school but also to excel. Sometimes, in college and in competitions, they even surpass their private school counterparts.

Poverty can be a hindrance, but it can be overcome. But how?

Ask parents, students

In 2005, together with Ma. Isabel Sison-Dionisio, a family and marriage counselor, Nerisa Fernandez, an Ateneo parent volunteer, and Pathways to Higher Education, an Ateneo group working with public school students, I spearheaded a study to discover what exactly makes public school children excel in school.

What better way than to ask the parents and the students themselves?

With the encouragement of Ateneo president Fr. Bienvenido Nebres, S.J., and the cooperation of Marikina Mayor Marides Fernando and Bulacan Gov. Josie de la Cruz, we surveyed more than 2,000 families of achieving students in 17 public high schools—eight in Marikina (Concepcion, Concepcion Integrated, Marikina, Marikina Heights, Parang, Tañong and Sta. Elena) and nine in Bulacan (Calumpit National, Dr. Felipe de Jesus Memorial, Guiguinto National, Lolomboy National, Meycauayan, Obando National, Parada, Prenza and San Roque).

As far as we know, this study is the first of its kind in the country.

The results of our study are heartening. The secret, it turns out, lies not so much in resources or enrichment, but in family values.

Many private school students go to tutorial centers after school, but public school children cannot afford to do this. The former usually have computers at home, which is not the case for the latter.

Parents of good private school students are generally academically successful, while many parents of public school kids did not finish school.

Powerful strategies

But according to our study, the families of our best public school students have more powerful strategies.

These are their secrets—discipline, goal-setting, self-reliance, strong family bonds and a conducive home environment.

Ninety-nine percent of the families of public school achievers in the survey agree that “discipline is a responsibility of the parents and an act of love.”

Parents enforce discipline consistently and early on, mainly through family discussions and through being good role models themselves.

Discipline in our country usually has a negative connotation, but in this study, it simply means instructing children or teens to behave well, such as being responsible for themselves.

When parents recognize the reasons for children’s misbehavior, they can balance the latter’s limits and choices.

The parents in the study are neither too strict nor too lenient. They set clear limits, listen to their children, and ensure appropriate consequences if the children err.

Discipline is the first step to success, for it fosters a sense of responsibility.

With discipline, children can work toward a goal. More than 90 percent of the parents help their children achieve personal goals, foremost of which is to finish school.

Early on, parents discuss career options with their children. They do not rely much on wishful thinking (such as winning the lottery); instead, they set specific and realistic goals.

These parents have high expectations of their children—and just as important, their children are aware of such expectations.

Effective communication (listening and talking) is important, and so is time management.

Hands-on parenting

Look at how discipline and goal-setting work in the family of Rolando “Rolly” and Zenaida Buenaventura.

When the children were young, they used to fight over toys. So Rolly confiscated the toys and replaced them with books, and now the children value books over their other possessions.

The parents believe in the Golden Rule: Do unto others what we want them to do unto us. During quarrels, Rolly acts as mediator, and asks each of his children to apologize and resolve to treat one another as they would want to be treated.

He supervises the children’s homework, and wakes them up in the morning.

He monitors TV watching by having only two channels available in the house, and limits the choices to game shows.

He reminds his children to study hard in order to finish college.

He tells them about people in the community who ended up jobless because they took the easy way out and did not finish school—“Sumunod lang sa agos (They just went with the flow).”

Rolly and Zenaida nurture their children well.

The eldest child, Keith, who graduated from Sta. Elena High School, is now a Pathways scholar, majoring in applied mathematics at the Ateneo.

Self-reliance, perseverance

Most of the families in our survey believe that success is achieved through hard work, not luck or fate. They believe in God, but they also know that God helps those who help themselves.

The children are patient, persistent and capable of delaying gratification.

Successful students believe that they can control their lives, while their less successful classmates are ruled by chance, malas (bad luck), or other factors.

Good students take responsibility for their actions. Poor students believe they are the victims of fate: They blame genetics (“We took after our parents—they were not good in math”); the teacher (“She plays favorites, and I am not her favorite”); or society (“We do not have enough money to go to good schools, so we may not be able to pass the college entrance test”).

IQ counts a little, but not much. Perseverance is more important.

Never giving up

Von Sinence underwent difficulties, but he never gave up.

Says Von: “I graduated valedictorian from Baloi Central Elementary School in Lanao del Norte. But when I moved to Manila for high school, I thought that it was a harder world. During the first week, not enough chairs were available in the classroom, so I had to sit on the floor. I also did not participate much in class because everyone spoke English, which I found difficult. Being in the star section terrified me.

“But I did not give up. Gradually, I became well-liked in school. I ran for a position in the student council, and to my surprise, I won, even though I did not think many students really knew who I was. I soon became Top One in our batch.”

As for Francis Alcausin, his mother Liberty believes in luck “sometimes,” but says that “90 percent of success is due to hard work.”

She denies herself simple pleasures, like movies or pocketbooks, in order to save for her children’s school needs. But her children, she says, are worth all the sacrifices in the world.

(To be concluded)